14 For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am of the flesh, sold under sin. 15 For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. 16 Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. 17 So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. 18 For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. Romans 7:14-20
This is the part of Romans that feels like Paul is reading my journal. I want to do what’s right, but I keep doing what I hate. There’s a war inside me. My mind agrees with God’s law, but my flesh pulls me in the opposite direction. It’s not just weakness—it’s slavery. And even though I’ve been freed, the residue of that slavery still shows up. I know what’s good, I even desire it, but I can’t carry it out perfectly. That gap between desire and ability—that’s where the battle lives.
This place is where we see people who have accepted Jesus, struggle with sin and addictive behavior. We need to want what Jesus wants for us, more than what our flesh wants for us. This can come in the form of pride, substances, sexual desires, and many more. Until we let Christ have Lordship over our life, the power of His Spirit can’t do the heavy work we need to overcome our struggle.
APPLICATION
I don’t pretend I’ve got it all together. I acknowledge the war. And in that war, I cling to grace. I don’t excuse my sin, but I don’t despair either. I keep fighting, knowing that the struggle itself is evidence that I’ve been changed. Dead people don’t wrestle—only the living do. And I’m alive in Christ.