Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”
Ephesians 6:1-3
We now move onto how children should obey their parents. What I think is beautiful about this passage is that it doesn’t have a timeframe associated with it. I am to follow this as a child of my parents with the exception of “leaving and cleaving” in my covenantal marriage to my wife. Colossians 3:20 has a similar exhortation.
Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.
All throughout the end of chapter 5 and now here in chapter 6, Paul’s ultimate call is for us to do these things because “it pleases the Lord”. The life experiences of our parents and their wisdom continue to help and impact us long into adulthood. I respect my parent’s opinions so much and I reach out to them for those opinions regularly. Now long into my age of account ability, I am responsible to the Lord for the decisions I make, but my thoughtful evaluation of their input has proven to be so beneficial.
Notice that Paul does not give the parents ammo to lord over our children here; it is a call specifically to the children to obey. It would not be honoring to the Lord for me to constantly remind my children of the command; but in our raising up of our family “in the ways of the Lord” will of course cover these aspects of God’s Word; it just shouldn’t be weaponized against them.
We have to assume that children (both boys and girls) were present when Paul’s letter was read to the Ephesian church. They would have been old enough to understand the concept of obeying and something they could embrace. Likewise, for those children who are not of an age to completely consume what is being said requires parents to understand the need for grace in regard to infants and toddlers who are learning what it means to be obedient and respectful of their parents.
The phrase “in the Lord” in Ephesians 6:1 simply means that children should obey their parents as part of their duty to God. It does not imply infant baptism or that children are full members of the community. The focus is on the relationship between children and their parents, emphasizing obedience because these are the parents given to them by the Lord. The term “in the Lord” refers to the verb “obey.” The verb “timaō” means to honor or respect someone. In this verse, it suggests a continuous attitude of respect, not just simple obedience. It means having a deep, personal regard for parents. This command is common in the New Testament and is a key part of Jewish culture.
This commandment is the first of the Ten Commandments that comes with a promise. It promises a long life in the land for those who obey it. This is important because it shows how we should treat others, while the first four commandments focus on our relationship with God. Paul expands this promise to mean a long life on earth for everyone, not just the Israelites. However, this promise isn’t guaranteed, as other factors can affect one’s lifespan. The main idea is that respecting parents leads to a peaceful and long life.
Application:
I need to be careful in my home of thrusting this into the faces of my kids (especially when I am frustrated). This danger will become clearer in verse 4 tomorrow. Our little ones are precious gifts to us from God and although He has this command to them, it does not alleviate my responsibility to honor Him in my love and raising of them.
Today’s Psalm:
My heart overflows with a pleasing theme;
I address my verses to the king;
my tongue is like the pen of a ready scribe.
Psalms 45:1